Thursday, December 29, 2011

0 Beauty heavens

I visit the parlor once every 45 days to get basic services done - waxing and sometimes pedicure. I really dont have the patience to go there - I just wish it was sophisticated for women to have hair in the hand like men and eyebrows as unruly as a pony. Alas.. times have changed and you are expected to follow some basic routines. All these parlors expect you to book an appointment and also ask for your preferred service personnel - I never ask for one. I expect all of them to have some basic knowledge. And waxing is basic.

At Chennai, I struggled initially to find a service that would suit me. I am quite finicky when it comes to donating my body for the plucking experience - I expect a separate room, undisturbed and calm, clean sheets, well-spoken,efficient & aware staff AND a relaxed approach.

'Not relaxed' is when you are made to feel you are a wooden piece that needs to be cut and polished by carpenters who have to grind 1000 pieces in the next few hours. The lady provides me with a change of dress and rushes back in a minute. Usually, there are two women who simultaneously set out on the task of honing my skin. There seems to a lot of time crunch. Fata-fat - Apply powder, the wax (sometimes ridiculously hot!), place the tissue and pull. and Pull. Apply and PULL. Just PULL. My skin is treated like a product - not like a human being's skin.

In the middle of it, when you are gloriously sitting half-exposed and feigning to read a magazine while wincing in pain, there are other ladies who keep interrupting - 'Give me the wax, the powder and tweazer'.  
Give me a break - I am not yet ready to expose to everyone and appear as a sensational cover piece.
To top it all, they keep talking in languages I don't understand - Are they saying "Oh look, how fat she is", "Look at the legs, they are like pillars", "Just be done fast, she will not give us more business", "Lets sell more, Try the dupe strategy". It might not be so bad but I find it rude when they chit-chat most of the time oblivious to my presence - again exactly like I am senseless furniture.

There are others who are incredibly slow - either because they are amateurs, scared to hurt you or simply want to please you. You can be assured that waxing will take an hour and what is left is half-mowed hands. These ladies either try to act knowledgeable or don't know anything about the product that they use on me. They are inadequately trained on the benefits and cannot answer if asked about the difference in price or time. Coming to the 'Acting I am a beautician' types - they try to put maska saying 'your hair is nice but ... ', 'the skin is so soft but...'. And after the but is the sales pitch. If you ask them further questions they are caught.

There is a definite difference in attitude when you spend or appear classy. You are given the most-experienced hair dresser, clean towels and meted out superior treatments.

But I also wonder how much these women earn and how do they feel when pretentious women squander their money?Some beauty treatments might cost half of their month's salary. Are they jealous?
Its like catering to a queen's wish - sitting on a pedestal, pampering your legs, removing the dirt. Do they find it demeaning? Ofcourse, if they had chosen the profession by choice, the question of self-respect will not arise. But still envying, comparing, fantasizing is women's nature, at least a wee bit.

I have been parlor-hopping for quite a while - but have settled on one that is less torturous. For the other folks out there, hope you have found that perfect place where you dream of relaxing when they work on you. For those of you who have found that lady or house that lets you sit back and enjoy - I am jealous.


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